Hello staff writers and fellow readers. Want to have a new assignment? Want to have some fun with your creative selves? Want a $5 gift certificate to The Cupcakery? Then read on my friends!

Many of you have probably heard of the Lyttle Lytton contest where people submit the worst first sentence of a novel. Visit http://www.adamcadre.ac/lyttle.html to read some examples of past years, and the 2009 winners.

Like this one "Pika ... chu, thought Pikachu. anonymous"

Or this gem "Deborah walked briskly down the street with pants on her legs. Susie Thai"


Your job is to write your best worst openeing sentence for your novel for Henderson Libraries staff to read. Here are some of the rules from the website that explains it a bit more.

"Your task is to write the beginning of an imaginary novel. Your goal is to make it hilariously bad. Note that wacky situations and intentional jokes are more suited to the beginnings of good comedic novels, not bad serious ones, and are therefore not really what this contest is about. On the flip side, significant butchering of the language (as opposed to subtle butchering) isn't all that funny either.
You need not limit an entry to one sentence, and you can even enter more than once. However, the maximum length of all your entries combined is 30 words. If the combined number of words you enter is over 30, all your entries are subject to disqualification."

So we will go off these rules, and there will be a judging on September 4th for the winner! Remember, the website may not have all appropriate sentences but this is a workplace, so keep it clean please! Go ahead and post a new post, and that way people can comment. Judges will see which sentences please the masses. If you don't have access to post to our Gazette, please let me know and I will invite you!

Also, if you read through the website more, there are more of the actual rules, hints, and information on submitting for the 2010 contest.